Balance in Belly Dance:
Alter Ego, Family Life and Honing the Art
For any level of the “Belly Dance Enthusiast,” hobbyist, amateur, semi-pro and professional, balancing Belly Dance with the rest of our lives can be difficult because of the amount of time we like to spend on it. Belly Dance has a way of becoming all consuming, and before we know it we’re addicted! I have been trying to figure out ways to better balance my life. I thought I’d share some of my thoughts with you. Maybe you’re experiencing some of the same problems – maybe my personal solutions will help you find your own, too.
The first area where I need balance is with my alter-ego. If you have a stage name, you know what I mean. Even if you go by your given name, you probably have a “performer” persona. Lately, I’ve been feeling a gap between my authentic “Elizabeth Ann Parr” self and “Sa’diyya.” Elizabeth is Sa’diyya and Sa’diyya is Elizabeth, so why do they feel different? I think of Elizabeth as the blue jeans and T-shirt wearin’ Southern, Christian, Girl-Next-Door of German and English heritage who lives in Suburbia, Texas with her wonderful husband and four cats. I think of “Sa’diyya” as this Egyptian – wannabe, exotic, glamorous, put-together, hard-working, professional dancer and instructor. This has been bothering me, so I’ve been trying to be both Elizabeth and Sa’diyya at the same time, all the time. If I could bridge that gap, I think it would make me more whole, and improve my dancing. I think the gap has something to do with truth and vulnerability, as well as the actually very strange feeling of practicing another culture’s dance form, when my closest Middle Eastern ancestry is probably Adam and Eve. Silly, fun-loving Elizabeth is hidden on stage, but why? Sa’diyya has some walls up because she feels like she has to hide Elizabeth in order to keep up the persona. Speaking of vulnerability…let’s just say it takes a lot of guts to talk about this in the public forum…and no, I don’t have multiple personalities!
Because Belly Dance is my sole income and it’s my hobby too (pitiful, I know), it’s hard to get away from it. And even though I love it, I should get away from it more than I currently do, because being all-consumed by Belly Dance makes it easier to get the BDBO’s (Belly Dance Burn Out).
To me and probably to most people, nothing is more important than family. We all know that a life without nourished relationships is pointless. Who cares about dancing if you have nobody to share it with? If an artist of any kind doesn’t care about the people around him or her, who cares about what that artist has to say? So family and friends come first. So I have decided that when I’m surfing YouTube for an hour to see the latest Cairo combinations from the Egyptian stars, I need to ask myself first, “Have I told my husband that I love him today?” and “Have I called my family and friends today?” Now, don’t get me wrong, I still surf YouTube and check out costumes and moves, but it’s all about time management.
So the last problem area is finding the time (and not going overboard with it) to practice! We all know that dancers at all levels should practice, but at different degrees. I have a long-distance dance friend, and every time we see each other we ask how our practice schedules are panning out. As professionals who should practice several hours everyday, plus working out and PR and more, we admit that it’s really hard. I have yet to completely fulfill my practice regimen, but I’m getting closer everyday. Honestly, the solution is, as Nike says, “Just Do It.” Here’s a sample ideal week that is a goal I’m working on – try to make one for yourself too! And then do it!
MONDAYS:
-Stretch in the morning: 15 min
-Workout (cardio and abs): 1 hr
-Belly Dance DVD or walk outside if the weather’s snazzy: 1 hr
-Pilates class
-Solo dance work: 1 hr
-Office/studio/instruction work: 2 hrs
-Teach: 4 hrs
TUESDAYS:
-Stretch in the morning: 15 min
-Belly Dance DVD: 1 hr
-Walk: 1 hr
-Yoga class
-Workout (upper strength and abs): 1 hr
-Solo dance work: 1 hr
-Office/studio/instruction work: 1 hr
-Teach: 4 hrs
WEDNESDAYS:
-Stretch in the morning: 15 min
-Workout (cardio and flexibility): 1 hr
-Belly Dance DVD or walk: 1 hr
-Ballet or Yoga class
-Solo dance work: 3 hrs
-Office/studio/instruction work: 2 hrs
THURSDAYS:
-Stretch in the morning: 15 min
-Walk: 1 hr
-Core workout class
-Belly Dance DVD: 1 hr
-Solo dance work: 1 hr
-Office/studio/instruction work: 1.5 hrs
-Teach: 4 hrs
FRIDAYS:
-Stretch in the morning: 15 min
-Workout (lower strength and abs): 1 hr
-Walk: 1 hr
-Solo dance: 3 hrs
-Belly Dance DVD: 1hr
…plus spending time with my husband, cleaning my house, eating healthy and breathing…
As you can see, dance is my job, and I feel that any full-time professional dancer needs to make time for keeping fit, practicing technique (Belly Dance DVDs are good for this), trying different dance forms, working on instructional lesson plans and trying to be a good business person, too. Hobbyists and amateurs might want to do some of the above things, too, to help improve their dancing. Health and stamina are keys to good dancing. Not only does implementing some practice/workout regimen improve one’s dancing, but it makes you feel great, too! No matter the pace of your progress on creating, stamina muscle tone or weight loss, you will feel great about pushing yourself, and it will show in your dancing for sure!
I have discovered lately that no matter how hard I try, if my life is out of balance, it shows in my dancing. I don’t feel like I’m radiating when I dance if my mind is cluttered and I’m stressed out and not taking care of myself. Lots of dancers probably feel this way, too. So to everyone who reads this, let’s make a vow to ourselves that we’ll take care of ourselves. And that means a lot of different things:
-Take care of and encourage others
-Think and be positive
-Be loving and forgiving to others and ourselves
-Eat healthfully
-Exercise
-Get enough sleep
-Don’t listen to your ego
-Work hard
-Give yourself time to relax and have fun
-Think for yourself
-Remember that every action affects someone or something out there
-Spend enough time with your spouse, kids, family and friends
-Be gracious
-Have a spiritual connection
My favorite “Stars” of Belly Dance are stars to me because of something more than their dancing. They are balanced, loving people (to themselves and others) who see the bigger picture in life and “get it.” It is my perception that some people think trying to “make it” in the entertainment business at all costs is the only way. I think it’s when an artist steps back, prioritizes and balances his or her life. Then things fall into place and their creations come from a higher, more meaningful place.
Alter Ego, Family Life and Honing the Art
For any level of the “Belly Dance Enthusiast,” hobbyist, amateur, semi-pro and professional, balancing Belly Dance with the rest of our lives can be difficult because of the amount of time we like to spend on it. Belly Dance has a way of becoming all consuming, and before we know it we’re addicted! I have been trying to figure out ways to better balance my life. I thought I’d share some of my thoughts with you. Maybe you’re experiencing some of the same problems – maybe my personal solutions will help you find your own, too.
The first area where I need balance is with my alter-ego. If you have a stage name, you know what I mean. Even if you go by your given name, you probably have a “performer” persona. Lately, I’ve been feeling a gap between my authentic “Elizabeth Ann Parr” self and “Sa’diyya.” Elizabeth is Sa’diyya and Sa’diyya is Elizabeth, so why do they feel different? I think of Elizabeth as the blue jeans and T-shirt wearin’ Southern, Christian, Girl-Next-Door of German and English heritage who lives in Suburbia, Texas with her wonderful husband and four cats. I think of “Sa’diyya” as this Egyptian – wannabe, exotic, glamorous, put-together, hard-working, professional dancer and instructor. This has been bothering me, so I’ve been trying to be both Elizabeth and Sa’diyya at the same time, all the time. If I could bridge that gap, I think it would make me more whole, and improve my dancing. I think the gap has something to do with truth and vulnerability, as well as the actually very strange feeling of practicing another culture’s dance form, when my closest Middle Eastern ancestry is probably Adam and Eve. Silly, fun-loving Elizabeth is hidden on stage, but why? Sa’diyya has some walls up because she feels like she has to hide Elizabeth in order to keep up the persona. Speaking of vulnerability…let’s just say it takes a lot of guts to talk about this in the public forum…and no, I don’t have multiple personalities!
Because Belly Dance is my sole income and it’s my hobby too (pitiful, I know), it’s hard to get away from it. And even though I love it, I should get away from it more than I currently do, because being all-consumed by Belly Dance makes it easier to get the BDBO’s (Belly Dance Burn Out).
To me and probably to most people, nothing is more important than family. We all know that a life without nourished relationships is pointless. Who cares about dancing if you have nobody to share it with? If an artist of any kind doesn’t care about the people around him or her, who cares about what that artist has to say? So family and friends come first. So I have decided that when I’m surfing YouTube for an hour to see the latest Cairo combinations from the Egyptian stars, I need to ask myself first, “Have I told my husband that I love him today?” and “Have I called my family and friends today?” Now, don’t get me wrong, I still surf YouTube and check out costumes and moves, but it’s all about time management.
So the last problem area is finding the time (and not going overboard with it) to practice! We all know that dancers at all levels should practice, but at different degrees. I have a long-distance dance friend, and every time we see each other we ask how our practice schedules are panning out. As professionals who should practice several hours everyday, plus working out and PR and more, we admit that it’s really hard. I have yet to completely fulfill my practice regimen, but I’m getting closer everyday. Honestly, the solution is, as Nike says, “Just Do It.” Here’s a sample ideal week that is a goal I’m working on – try to make one for yourself too! And then do it!
MONDAYS:
-Stretch in the morning: 15 min
-Workout (cardio and abs): 1 hr
-Belly Dance DVD or walk outside if the weather’s snazzy: 1 hr
-Pilates class
-Solo dance work: 1 hr
-Office/studio/instruction work: 2 hrs
-Teach: 4 hrs
TUESDAYS:
-Stretch in the morning: 15 min
-Belly Dance DVD: 1 hr
-Walk: 1 hr
-Yoga class
-Workout (upper strength and abs): 1 hr
-Solo dance work: 1 hr
-Office/studio/instruction work: 1 hr
-Teach: 4 hrs
WEDNESDAYS:
-Stretch in the morning: 15 min
-Workout (cardio and flexibility): 1 hr
-Belly Dance DVD or walk: 1 hr
-Ballet or Yoga class
-Solo dance work: 3 hrs
-Office/studio/instruction work: 2 hrs
THURSDAYS:
-Stretch in the morning: 15 min
-Walk: 1 hr
-Core workout class
-Belly Dance DVD: 1 hr
-Solo dance work: 1 hr
-Office/studio/instruction work: 1.5 hrs
-Teach: 4 hrs
FRIDAYS:
-Stretch in the morning: 15 min
-Workout (lower strength and abs): 1 hr
-Walk: 1 hr
-Solo dance: 3 hrs
-Belly Dance DVD: 1hr
…plus spending time with my husband, cleaning my house, eating healthy and breathing…
As you can see, dance is my job, and I feel that any full-time professional dancer needs to make time for keeping fit, practicing technique (Belly Dance DVDs are good for this), trying different dance forms, working on instructional lesson plans and trying to be a good business person, too. Hobbyists and amateurs might want to do some of the above things, too, to help improve their dancing. Health and stamina are keys to good dancing. Not only does implementing some practice/workout regimen improve one’s dancing, but it makes you feel great, too! No matter the pace of your progress on creating, stamina muscle tone or weight loss, you will feel great about pushing yourself, and it will show in your dancing for sure!
I have discovered lately that no matter how hard I try, if my life is out of balance, it shows in my dancing. I don’t feel like I’m radiating when I dance if my mind is cluttered and I’m stressed out and not taking care of myself. Lots of dancers probably feel this way, too. So to everyone who reads this, let’s make a vow to ourselves that we’ll take care of ourselves. And that means a lot of different things:
-Take care of and encourage others
-Think and be positive
-Be loving and forgiving to others and ourselves
-Eat healthfully
-Exercise
-Get enough sleep
-Don’t listen to your ego
-Work hard
-Give yourself time to relax and have fun
-Think for yourself
-Remember that every action affects someone or something out there
-Spend enough time with your spouse, kids, family and friends
-Be gracious
-Have a spiritual connection
My favorite “Stars” of Belly Dance are stars to me because of something more than their dancing. They are balanced, loving people (to themselves and others) who see the bigger picture in life and “get it.” It is my perception that some people think trying to “make it” in the entertainment business at all costs is the only way. I think it’s when an artist steps back, prioritizes and balances his or her life. Then things fall into place and their creations come from a higher, more meaningful place.
